How to Help Your Parents and Still Save for Retirement

​There’s nothing quite like the sense of security and accomplishment that comes with knowing you’re on the path to a comfortable retirement. But, that feeling can quickly dissolve into stress—even guilt—when you discover your parents are lagging far behind you on the path to their own retirement.

“My husband and I are in a good place for retirement,” Cerissa H. told us. “Our parents, however, are not, and for different reasons.” Cerissa’s parents had careers in full-time ministry and never had a large income. Her in-laws are drowning in debt on several rental properties.
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“We are concerned about their quality of life, the lack of long-term care insurance for all of them, and the debt,” she said. “How do we prepare for a life where we will probably inherit adult dependents and debt? How do we encourage my parents to maintain hope for their financial future? How do we respectfully talk to my in-laws about their debt?”

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“How do we prepare for a life where we will probably inherit adult dependents and debt?"

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A Lot of Us Are Worried About Our Parents’ Retirement

Many people in this category also have limited assets to rely on when they retire. Only 35% own their home outright, and 41% do not own a home at all. For those age 65 and older, Social Security makes up more than half of their household income.

Gary Shaw, investing advisor with Shaw Financial, said all this adds up to a difficult outlook both for the retirees and their children.

“I think what we’ve discovered is that parents really didn’t plan on not being able to live on Social Security,” he said. “They didn't realize their expenses, especially health care, were going to be as high as they are. Or they didn't get their house paid off as soon as they planned, so they still have to make a house payment.”

When retirement funds are short or nonexistent, many seniors see no other option but to keep working.
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​Nearly 60% of pre-retirees plan to keep working past retirement age. That includes 29% who say they will never retire. But among people who are already retired, the reality is only 29% were actually able to remain in the workforce past retirement age.

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“I think what we’ve discovered is that parents really didn’t plan on not being able to live on Social Security,” 

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How to Start the Retirement Conversation With Your Parents

Statistics aside, the future you and your parents are facing will often feel overwhelming. But it is possible to make it through this tough time with your parents’ dignity and your own retirement plan intact.

As with any challenge, the first step is to get a clear picture of what you’re dealing with. But having an in-depth conversation about your folks’ money situation can be tough for everyone involved.

“Sometimes the parents won't share all the details with the kids,” Gary explained. “They don't want them to know how bad it really is. As a parent you want your kids to look up to you. You don't want your kids thinking less of you because you didn't manage money properly.”

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"...it is possible to make it through this tough time with your parents’ dignity and your own retirement plan intact."

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At Next Step, we make it easier for you to have the conversation with your parents. One of our family services is a "Family Meeting". This service is customizable to your family dynamic setup. We facilitate in-home, or virtual (online) meetings to help you either set the stage and/or have the tough discussions in a safe environment with a professional facilitator. We help you establish the blue print for a plan of action regarding your loved one's care for life's next steps.  Families that work with Next Step are prepared to respond with guidance from our team and the plan, versus react and just bandage each life event as they come up.​

During a Family Meeting, we provide a comfortable atmosphere in which to address the uncomfortable topics of advanced care planning. Included with the Family Meeting is our In Case of Emergency Binder (I.C.E.). This notebook will direct you through each topic and provide a place to house all pertinent information. It also includes a FREE app for your smartphone, tablet, or computer. This allows family or personal representatives remote access from any electronic smart device or computer.
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Choose Next Step as your first line of defense in helping your loved one face the challenges of aging and helping you when you've realized that your current situation needs more support.

Click here to purchase a Family Meeting or an In Case of Emergency (I.C.E.) binder for your family today.
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Excerpts reprinted with permission. Originally published at Dave Ramsey's blog