Naomi Feil, founder of Validation therapy, shares a breakthrough moment of communication with Gladys Wilson, a woman who was diagnosed with Alzheimer's in 2000 and was virtually non-verbal. Our Next Step staff has been fortunate enough to receive training from Naomi through the Validation Institute. Our hope is that we are able to share with our families this power of love. More info: www.memorybridge.org The Jewish Standard
"God's Love: Naomi Feil, a Jewish woman, sings Christian hymns for Gladys, who has Alzheimer's and was unable to speak. Watch what happens at the end, when Mrs. Feil opens her heart and gives Ms. Gladys what she needs so deeply." #Alzheimers, #SeniorHealth, #MusicTherapy, #Religion, #Judaism, #Christianity, #Godslove, #Validationtherapy
9 Comments
Retirement Jobs — For those working past retirement age, RetirementJobs.com is a great resource. If you’re over the age of 50, you can join for free and browse job listings from major companies with hiring practices that are not age-discriminatory. Along with a growing number of labor analysts, RetirementJobs.com's human resources experts observe that a long-predicted workforce change is now underway. The change, possibly the largest since women went to work en masse in the 1970's, is spurred by several factors. Among them: population shifts that have baby boomers turning age 65 amidst a dwindling supply of younger workers, health changes that have people living longer than ever, a new definition of retirement that includes a desire to stay active or a need to remain gainfully employed (see "What is a Retirement Job?"), and new research confirming what many may have known all along-- that, on top of experience, older workers bring valuable traits such as lower turnover, greater dependability, a stronger work ethic, and flexibility over work schedule and pay. At RetirementJobs.com, their goal is to identify companies most-suited to older workers and match them with active, productive, conscientious, mature adults seeking a job or project that matches their lifestyle. Are seeking to supplement your income, a new challenge, a way to get out and meet people, or another reason? This article is reprinted from the About Us page at retirementjobs.com
Spending time with people that are perceived as different than us can be difficult. We oftentimes feel as if we have nothing in common with them and so we feel awkward and uncomfortable; we don’t want to waste our time and energies being there. Throughout the holiday season as you spend time with older family and friends, be prepared for the unexpected in regard to behavior and interactions based on how life and age affect us. It’s ALWAYS hard for us to be faced with seeing and interacting with decline in our loved ones. Our responses to the decline in our loved ones greatly impacts the way our children interact with them also. It’s our job to help them have a POSITIVE perception of aging, and of their elders. Our kids will mirror how we respond. This is an excellent opportunity to set the standard for their behavior with the elderly (they too will one day become elderly - as unimaginable as that may seem). This is crucial as these little children will be the ones responding to us when we are elderly (yes, you too will one day grow old)! Older adults need the life/livelihood of kids and teens just as the lives of youngsters are enhanced by interactions with their seniors. Help them enjoy these holiday visits by preempting some of the discomfort that they may feel. Prepare Them
Humanize Them
Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been. Mark TwainDealing with cognitive impairment can bring out many strong emotions. As the disease progresses, caregiving issues can often ignite or magnify family conflicts. These strategies can help families cope with the situation together. Tips for Families Listen to each family member with respect
Discuss caregiving responsibilities
Continue to talk
Seek outside help If tensions and disagreements are ongoing, you may want to seek help from a trusted third party, such as a spiritual leader, mediator or counselor. Sometimes, an outside perspective can help everyone take a step back and work through the difficult issues. To schedule a Family Meeting or to get professional resource referrals, contact Next Step Senior Care Inc at info@nextstepsco.com, 949-573-8504. The content on this page is taken from https://www.alz.org/care/alzheimers-dementia-family-conflicts.asp
When families live far away from one another, the holidays may be the only opportunity that long-distance caregivers and family members have to personally observe older relatives. Family members who haven't seen their aging loved one since last year may be in for a shock at what they see and experience a natural desire to close one’s eyes, turn the other way, pretend like everything is as it used to be. With pregnancy, one has several months to prepare...longer if you are planning for it. But with seniors it’s different. The revelation that your parents are no longer the independent, capable people you have depended on your entire life often hits you unexpectedly. Of course you realize that they will eventually slow down and need some assistance. You are aware that you may be involved with that assistance. However, you cannot predict when that inconvenient truth will surface. You cannot predict, but you can prepare. Just as a pregnancy book can guide you through the stages of development, Next Step Senior Care Inc is here to be your guide through the stages of life's autumn years. What To Look For This Holiday SeasonBe aware of subtle, yet obvious changes in your loved one's emotional well-being. Take note for signs of depression that may include loss of interest in hobbies, sleep patterns, withdrawal from activities with others, lack of basic home maintenance or personal hygiene. Pay attention to their surroundings. Your loved one may have always been a neat freak, or a stickler for paying bills on time and you notice unsafe clutter, an overflowing hamper and piled up mail. Yes, you desire to give them respect as an adult, but part of that may now come in the form of YOU supporting them with some run-of-the-mill activities of daily living that are no longer easy tasks for them to accomplish. Pay close attention to the way your parent moves, and in particular how they walk. A reluctance to walk or obvious pain during movement can be a sign of joint or muscle problems or more serious afflictions. And if unsteady on their feet, they may be at risk of falling, a serious problem that can cause severe injury or worse. Weight loss is one of the obvious signs of declining health. The cause could be based on physical or emotional factors and sometimes medications. Low levels of energy will often result and cause them to no longer be capable of accomplishing some of their basic care needs. Notice how much water they consume daily. Dehydration, a serious condition for anyone, is often overlooked in the winter months. Encourage them to drink water and use the restroom frequently during the early parts of the day when they are more alert and often have more energy. This may help them to have less trips during the night. Bring your listening ears with you. Choose to not judge, react or criticize their current lifestyle circumstances. Take your time assessing and talking over what you see with other trusted friends or resources so you will be able to process this strange, new reality and respond appropriately, when the time is right. If you notice sudden odd behavior with your loved one, be sure to seek medical attention. There may be other areas of concern, specific to your family member. Should this year's holiday visit open your eyes to current and potential problems or negative changes in your parent's physical or emotional state, then it's time to... put a plan of action in place. ...the HOLIDAYS. A word that stirs up various emotions about family, food, and fun. Spending time with family can be both joyous and heart-wrenching. It’s often because we position ourselves to be “schooled” in some way, shape or form. It’s called the School of Life and the class is usually titled ‘How You Have Grown (or Not) from the Last Encounter with Family.’ Regardless of the interactions, how are you going to be the best version of you that allows for maintaining good boundaries, but allows for you to show your care and support for each of the family and friends that you are gifted to spend time with. I love the lyrics from the Michael Jackson song “Man In The Mirror”, ‘If you want to make the world a better place, take a look at yourself and then make a change.’ May you appreciate and release thanksgiving for the friends and family you have around you at this season. Make the choice to move into this holiday season with ‘Eyes Wide Open’. I encourage you to take the time to be the silent observer and check out what’s going on around you with your family and friends. There will be a plethora of little ways you can make your world, and someone else’s, a better place. Time is a gift that you can give to both yourself and to another person, your undivided attention. Take a few moments to engage in conversation to listen, support and encourage someone around you. (Note, I did not say enslave yourself to someone for a 45 minute monologue of their woes. Gracefully extract yourself after (10 minutes) and let them know you appreciated getting a chance to connect with them.) Give yourself the gift of time to sit, breathe deeply, nap, play in a way that brings you refreshment. As the relatives come out, choose awareness and assess how each person has changed from the last time you were with them… Be willing to ask yourself the harder questions: How is Aunt Sally is doing? What about my own parents; How are MY PARENTS doing? Dad’s been slowing down lately, do I really want to address his aging issues? If I don’t am I hiding my head in the sand and choosing to be in denial of the class we all have to take in the School of Life that most of us hate? Aging is inevitable and so is change? This season, don’t approach the holidays with your eyes wide shut. Family get-togethers are the ideal opportunity to open your eyes, your heart, and your mind to the changes in the abilities of your senior relatives. They need you to see what they can’t so that they can walk through life’s changes maintaining a feeling of safety, support and peace of mind. Click here to download our Checklist to Assess Daily Living Changes and move into the holidays with your ‘Eyes Wide Open’.
Mark & I have done several talks in the last few weeks to the Baby Boomers - 55 years and over - on "Aging Gracefully" I have always been fascinated at how some people age gracefully and others don't, so I am listing the things that appear to contribute to graceful aging naturally. I find the areas of the body that trouble people most as they get older (and many who are younger) are: 1. The Bowels 2. The Bladder 3. The Brain 4. The Bones When you focus on living a life that helps each of these systems work optimally you will find that all the other areas that age noticeably, such as your skin, muscles, weight and energy improve dramatically. 1. The Bowels - Foods that improve bowel function are those containing water soluble fibre (the gentle soothing fibre) and this is found particularly in fresh ripe fruit. I encourage every one to add at least 3 portions of fresh fruit daily to their diet and they may do this by adding fruit to smoothies and or just eating them as they are. Recently I had a woman who is type 1 diabetes, tell me she could not eat fruit or any fruit juices. So I made her a smoothie with frozen - you can use fresh and just add extra ice - mango and strawberries, organic apple juice, a scoop of Propeas. Her blood sugar was 7.6 before she had the smoothie, within 15 minutes it was down to 7.2 and after an hour it was down to 5.4 - she could not believe what she was seeing and became almost tearful because she had been avoiding fruit for years and so badly wanted to eat it. Remember, fresh fruit contains the right fibre, sugar and nutrients to regulate blood sugar - and I have seen this in every diabetic we test. I do insist that they add the Propeas and or eat a handful of nuts or seeds as the plant protein also helps regulate blood sugar. Natural fats found in plant foods are essential for bowel function so make sure you have 1 portion of either one or the other of the following - Avocado, olives, raw nuts or seeds. Over and above that have 1 portion of flax oil (and the best I have ever used is Aimega from The Aim Companies) We take 2-4 a day. Don't over do the fats as too much of even good fat has now been shown to reduce the energy production centers in the cells (mitochondria) and this will slow down the metabolism causing weight gain. Cooking in fat - any fat - even organic coconut oil is too much fat - so try not to add fat to food or cook in it. Legumes like lentils, beans and chickpeas also contain very valuable fibre that helps digestive tract movement, stabilizes blood sugar and lower cholesterol levels. It may take your digestive tract a few weeks to adjust to the fibre in these foods so add small quantities to start with and then add as your comfort improves. 2. The Bladder - Foods that improve bladder function are whole plant foods and ideally your diet should contain at least 75% fresh, raw fruit and vegetables. Green leafy vegetables in particularly are extremely alkaline and contribute to a healthy bladder. Make sure to include the most nutritious of all green plants - barley grass juice (we use BarleyLife and find the nutritional profile still the best of all other green juices) Plants that help bladder function, Slippery elm and Shave grass or horsetail grass and our found in Composure - a combination of natural plants and herbs from the same company that makes BarleyLife and also contains Irish Moss , which strengths and thickens the skin in older people, making fine lines and wrinkles appear a LOT less. Irish Moss also helps regulate body weight and will contribute to getting rid of that spare tire around the waist. Composure also helps improve sleep, keep you calm and your mind clear and focused. Foods that contribute to bladder problems are ; - animal protein - limit this to not more than 3 times a week and never bigger than the size of the palm of your hand. Remember you don't need to eat flesh to make human flesh and that all plant foods contains protein in varying amounts. Nuts and seeds can contain more than animal flesh - up to 30% and if you feel you need extra protein in a supplement - Propeas contains 70% complete protein from peas with a great vanilla flavor. 3. The Brain - Foods that help the brain function optimally are fresh fruit, nuts, seeds, vegetables, grains and legumes. All these foods contain the right fibre and nutrients that help the body regulate blood sugar and regulated blood sugar is essential for optimal brain function. The right plant fats are needed to transport cholesterol from the liver, where it is made to the brain for optimum brain health. Cholesterol lowering drugs can cause memory loss and brain issues as the brain requires large quantities of cholesterol, but without natural plant fats, especially omega 3's found in flax oil (Aimega I find best) the cholesterol cannot be transported to the brain where it is needed and to several other places like the skin, where it is converted into Vitamin D , which is needed for healthy strong bones.which gets me to the next issue Then you need to have a sense of purpose - Rabbi Jonathan Sacks (Now been knighted for his work in the UK) believes that we have been created for the very specific purpose of healing and helping the the people in world, known as "Tikun Olam". I have seen that people that are focused on helping others rather than focusing on their own needs are younger in mind, body and soul and a lot nicer to be with as they seldom complain! Start by healing yourself with a healthy diet and lifestyle and then you will find it easier to help others get well. Our mission is to get the whole world well. 4. Healthy Bones - Bones stay healthy when your diet is 75%-80% alkaline forming (which means that much of your diet should be fresh fruit and vegetables) and the www.100daystohealth.com free online program will help you do just that in 3 months. Bones need natural light on the skin to make the essential Vit D you need, but wont do this efficiently if you take cholesterol lowering meds. Sunlight on the skin lowers cholesterol natural as long as you take flax oil daily. Bones also need at least 20-30 minutes of outdoor exercise daily - as muscles pull on the bones, so they become stronger. Bones need natural minerals including calcium in the right ratio and barley grass juice has the best calcium to phosphorous ratio - another reason we take BarleyLife daily. So to age gracefully we suggest that you 1. Eat 75%-80% fresh fruit and veggies 2. Exercise outdoors daily for 20-30 minutes making sure you get natural light on the skin 3. Get well so you can help get the whole world well.. To Life! Mark & Mary-Ann www.naturalway.co.za (RSA) www.wholelifewell.com (USA) Dotty had dementia. Her words of wisdom apply to all styles of communication but are especially helpful when speaking to a person with dementia. Try these tips to improve your relationships. 6. Slow down. And don't sneak up on me and start talking. Did I tell you I like smiles? Dotty went to Heaven on May 25, 2012.
We found her tips at the Alzheimer’s Reading Room http://www.alzheimersreadingroom.com/ A recent study found that people tended to identify the “seat of their selves” as either residing in their hearts or their brains. And as you may already suspect, people who self-identified as emotional and sympathetic felt their essences resided in their hearts and those who self-identified as logical and rational thought their essences were brain-bound. What’s most striking about these findings is that the two organs associated with self-identity are the same ones that are most affected by the ravages of the aging process. As we get older, arteries may harden, and our brains can undergo a slow, age-related decline. To say that this is a frightening prospect is an understatement. The good news is that there is AIM BarleyLife. It’s chock full of vitamins and minerals that benefit both the heart and the brain. For example, research by the Federation of American Societies for Experimental Biology that looked at nearly 1,000 adults and their eating habits for over a decade found that test subjects who ate one or two servings of leafy green vegetables per day had the mental faculties of someone a decade younger than those who consumed none. The researchers accredit these health benefits to the vitamin K, lutein, folate and beta-carotene content found in leafy green vegetables. While most of these nutrients have been linked to cognitive health before, this is the first study in history that looked for both and found a link between vitamin K and brain health. BarleyLife contains 10% of your daily folate needs and 100% of vitamin K. As far as heart health goes, a study published in April 2015 in the Journal Of Clinical Nutrition examined the mortality rates of chronic kidney disease (CKD) sufferers.The most common cause of death for people with CKD is cardiovascular disease due to increased arterial calcification. By analyzing data in the National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey, scientists were able to determine that those CKD patients who consumed adequate amounts of vitamin K were less likely to die and significantly less likely to die from cardiovascular disease. Previous studies have also linked vitamin K to a reduction in arterial calcification. It doesn’t matter whether you identify with your heart or your brain, drinking BarleyLife is a boon to both. It’s a smart decision that will leave you feeling good. Don’t forget the Folate! Folate also plays a big role in heart and brain health. Folate consumption has been linked to lower homocysteine levels, a factor in determining the risk of cardiovascular disease and Alzheimer’s. Low folate levels have also been linked to depression. Reprinted with permission of AIM International Inc, Nampa, Idaho We couldn't have said this better, so this is a re-post from author and humorist, Jan Marshall. Currently silly statements proclaim that 80 is the new 60 which becomes the new 30 and so on, thus changing every number we have known from the beginning of time to a different value. Then comics and others poke fun at us for being forgetful. Then many familiar titles of products and their purpose is exchanged for a strange, newer one. For example: in the past when we referred to an eye pad it was for a pink eye. Now, it means something altogether wonderful and brilliant, the iPad® device which I would not put away under penalty of law unless Sean Connery asked me to lay it down for him. Obviously terminology has changed as to cause brain fog in any intelligent, vital person. Plus we’ve heard said that what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. This in fact does not prove it is because we are discreet but rather that we go blank for what happened or whom we ended up with because all words, and names have been revised. Will the real Puff Daddy, Sean Combs, Diddy, P.Diddy, Snoop Dog, Snoop Lion, Fast Eddie, oh wait that’s my ex; stop playing the name game. There is Ice Tea and Lady Gaga and 30 cents-he used to be 50 cents but in this economy… and a bunch of less talented dolts who make up ridiculous names and grab their crotches a lot. We were more mature sophisticated folks in the old days when our groups were called Motley Crue, Grateful Dead and Alice Cooper, such a nice girls name, to mention a few. Whadda ya gonna do with kids today!!!!! Some professionals have changed their business names and some times we forget whom to ask for when calling our own kids. What are they going with these days? What means shall we we use to contact with them? Is it their cell phone, land line or Dick Tracy wrist phone? Should we use their texting name or prison or twitter handle? At one time if we described as being with it that meant we were enthusiastic and knowledgeable. Now when we want to express our joy to you, we are supposed to claim, “I am down” (which used to be filler for my blankie) according to the new jargon. You all changed the rules and then you call us old mindless geezers. Knock it off. Yes we are graying but we are also giggling and gyrating in this age of googling®. Get clear on this here and now. We are not your father’s Oldsmobile® or your old time grandparents either. Most of us are computer or at least smart phone literate although the virtual secretary Siri in our phone can be an idiot at times. On the other hand she does remind us to soak our teeth or anything that aches. Rather than a matchmaker or archaic courting customs from the last century, we find dates on the Internet, though not always successfully. On one site, I requested a big fellow and one man arrived on stilts. We had a good relationship until I ended it because I kept getting splinters in my thighs. What you do not know and should wise up about is that most of us are simply in the second phase of life; these are the years 41-80*. Just like you are and we are hot. Usually hormone replacement therapy remedies that. We love to dance and jog and Zumba®. We enjoy going to the theatre and movies. We practice yoga or Tai Chi, have learned to paint and sculpt, enjoy watching sports and appreciate fine dining. Those two don’t actually go together especially at the ballpark. And no more pancakes, or early bird dates. How about meeting us instead at a restaurant serving true international cuisine with fine wine, imported beer and soft jazz wafting in the background? Let’s play tennis, go skiing or meet on the racket ball court. Believe it or not, some of us can still do it, though, perhaps not as vigorously as you. And we now have our chiropractor on speed dial just in case you are injured. Take a foreign language or cooking class with us. Talk with us as if we were peers, (to a degree). FYI: To us friends with benefits means someone who adds us to their insurance policy. Though the other still has its place as part of the full menu. We like to learn new things and we attend classes or pursue cutting edge activities that we may not have had time for when raising our families. You do not know everything about us. Don’t wait too long. We want to know you better, too. You may be surprised and impressed with what we have endured and survived to get to this place before ending up as your loving relatives, friends, and neighbors. Why don’t you ask? Furthermore and thankfully, science produced those little blue pills that have energized some of us and birth control has relieved anxiety so our grandkids do not end up being embarrassed by having tiny aunts and uncles who are in diapers. We now appreciate the slow, thoughtful acts of love. Yes…we still do it, though chandeliers no longer have the appeal they once did. We are news junkies and keep up on most world events and are willing to listen to what you young’uns have to say, usually. The point here is we don’t simply need your obligatory holiday visit where you are texting from entry to exit. You do not have to bring us flowers or a tie as your duty. We certainly do not need any more crap cluttering our lives. But your attention would be appreciated. Let us have revealing conversations as you would with other humans. Teach us something new and we will do the same for you. There is so much of our history that might intrigue you and certainly the reverse is true. We probably have been through and survived much of what you are going through. Maybe we can give you a solution and maybe not. We have no ego involved in whether you follow our advice or ignore it. When we suggest you might want to avoid the pothole on the next street, or other cautionary tales, it is up to you whether to do that or not. It is your life. We simply want to share it more thoughtfully. Can you stop with ageist labels already? You can call us seasoned citizens if you wish or granny or pa or nana or by our own names if that is agreed upon. It does not matter what you call us; just call us. Lets get down, dude! PS. Birthday numbers are meaningless especially in this digital age. Cheese ages. We in fact evolve and are still booming and blooming. There are plenty of terms like infants, tweens, teens, adults, and enough titles to wear out a label maker. Lets mobilize to have the law changed to stop counting the years and change it to just another phase we are going through, okay! THE FORMULA *Phase 1: YEARS 1-40 Phase 2: YEARS 41-80 (Yay! I’m in same phase as my kids and Sophia Loren) *Phase 3: YEARS 81-120 Thereafter, you deserve to call it anything you wish. THE END How Important is it for us to raise our kids to embrace the elderly? To show love to that which is often considered by society as unlovely. Love releases power, strength, support, ingenuity, collaboration, hope, compassion, life, mercy, devotion, goodness..the miracle power of love. |
Details
Archives
February 2023
|